Gotta' say, I ain't heard any of these before .... enjoy.
The location
of your mailbox shows you how far away from your house you can be in a
robe...before You start looking like a mental patient.
My therapist
said that my narcissism causes me to misread social situations. I'm
pretty sure she was hitting on me.
My 60
year kindergarten reunion is coming up soon and I'm worried
about the 175 lbs I've gained since then.
I always
wondered what the job application is like at Hooters. Do they just
give you a bra and say, "Here, fill this out?"
The speed
with which a woman says "nothing" when asked "What's
wrong?"...is inversely proportional to the severity of the crap storm
that's coming.
Denny's has
a slogan, 'If it's your birthday, the meal is on us.' If you're
in Denny's and it's your birthday, your life sucks!
If
I make you breakfast in bed, a simple "Thank you" is all
I need...not all this, "How did you get into my house"
business!
The pharmacist
asked me my birth date again today. Pretty sure she's going to get
me something.
On average,
an American man will have sex two to three times a week. Whereas, a
Japanese man will have sex only one or two times a year. This is
very upsetting news to me. I had no idea I was Japanese.
I
can't understand why women are okay that JC Penny has an older
women's clothing line named, "Sag Harbor".
I think
it's pretty cool how Chinese people made a language entirely out of tattoos.
What
is it about a car that makes people think we can't see them pick
their noses?
Money can't
buy happiness but it keeps the kids in touch!
The reason
Mayberry was so peaceful and quiet was because nobody was married...Andy,
Aunt Bea, Barney, Floyd, Howard, Goober, Gomer, Sam, Earnest T Bass,
Helen, Thelma Lou, Clara ... and, of course, Opie--all single. The only
married person was Otis, and he stayed drunk all the time.
No comments:
Post a Comment